Bruise.

I'm sitting in the bedroom while Emily naps, checking blogs, sifting through email, and trying not to jump out of my pants every time a massive thunder clap shakes our little house. 

Good grief.

I was in the middle of replying to an email when I caught a glimpse of something scurrying at the speed of light--across my hand, on to my track pad, and off the other side of my laptop.

I resisted the instinct to throw the laptop across the room and run around in circles screaming. I lifted the laptop, set it aside (with the speed of a ninja, of course), and saw the little bugger. All that went through my head was: 

KILL IT! KILL IT NOW!!!!

So without further adieu, I proceeded to smack my thigh with my open palm. 

Over. And Over.

With all the frantic force I could muster.

Lauren : 1

Lighting-Fast Jerk of a Spider : 0

p.s. 

my leg hurts...